Seeking Therapy When Facing a Cancer Diagnosis

King Charles III has cancer. A familiar experience for so many. The King will step back from his “royal duties.” He has shared the news “personally” with family - some close and others a bit estranged. The Prince of Wales, Prince William, is stepping up to the plate, despite his wife experiencing her own medical problems as she recovers from surgery. Queen Camilla is gathering the energy to support her husband and amp up her obligations. The Duke of Sussex, Prince Harry, is certain to be processing some unresolved and uncomfortable emotions. Yet, after hearing the news, he immediately flew back to England to visit his father. 

Strong emotions surface at once when a person receives a medical diagnosis.  Seeking out talk therapy can be a comforting and productive way to sort out what the next chapter may look like. Often when a person has uncertain information and questions with no right answers, they find it hard to talk. Understandably, loved ones are afraid to approach the person who has the medical ailment about difficult issues. 

A person facing a serious diagnosis has to figure out all the details. It’s overwhelming. Who can fulfill your responsibilities if you cannot? In the case of King Charles, he quickly had to figure out how he could manage his “royal duties.”  Then, there are feelings of guilt, angst, and sadness for the loss of your ability to do what you normally see as daily tasks.  There also may be concerns about the person or people you are asking to manage your responsibilities in your absence. Is that person up to the task? Am I a burden? How does their family feel about what I am asking? A licensed mental health clinician can provide a safe space to discuss things that are hard to say to loved ones. An objective professional can help you learn and practice distress tolerance and other coping skills to manage living in discomfort emotionally and physically. 

 

Another area that can be addressed in psychotherapy is your public image. What do people know about my condition? What should I tell them? Should I keep certain things private? At what point can I or my loved ones share things and with whom? What are people saying about me? All of these topics are sure to be emotionally fueled and being with a person who can see the facts is essential.

One other aspect of facing a difficult diagnosis is how your loved ones are affected. Establishing a support system for yourself and your family members is crucial. All parties need an outlet or else there may be too much space for hurt feelings, misunderstandings, and unproductive conversations. Sometimes, when we have unresolved issues with a family member and that family member gets sick, we feel additional pressure to mend fences quickly. Whether you're royalty or not, a therapist can provide support and guidance to manage difficult conversations.